Clomid Day Four and Five

Days three and four went a lot like two and three. There were more hot flashes, my bitchy attitude, and a new fun one-- headaches. Having suffered from migraines for most of my life (from about age 14 or 15) these little "clomid" headaches go from little to big in seconds. Vicodin is my friend and the phenegran they gave me. Wow. God bless the man who invented phenegran. (Phenegran is for nausea) Though I have to watch out since I should ovulate towards the end of this week and we want babies! No more drugs after babies (well, not the good ones at least) so I'm making the best of them now. :)

We had a busy weekend. Did a ton of babysitting on Saturday in addition to running errands and planting flowers in the yard! yay! :) Sunday we went to see his parents and had lunch and then we headed back here. I had an activity to attend with Jill and then came home. I had a headache that was progressing to a migraine (go figure!) so dh and I snuggled into bed and watched The Nutty Professor. I forgot how funny it is! :)

It was beautiful today despite the storms last night. At some point it knocked our power out and I miraculously woke up around 3:30am to a blinking alarm clock. I scrambled around *while everyone else slept. The dogs even looked at me like "lady it ain't time to get up!"* I set the alarm and fell right to sleep. :) The storm did tear up our screen door-- the hinge part that makes it slide shut. So we need to fix that before the appraiser comes to appraise the house. We should be closing by the end of this month. Whoopee! :)

Dh and I are going to one of my managers house in the morning. He is going to mow and trim her lawn and I am going to clean. So with such a busy day tomorrow, I should be heading off to bed now. Goodnight, sweet dreams...

Clomid Day Two and Three

Bitchiness prevails. I'm liable to snap at any and all living things these days. It's awful. And the hot flashes!!! I thought I was going to sweat to death today at work. IT WAS UNBEARABLE! I picked a fight last night with dh and for the love of God I don't know what I was fighting about! Please please please pray that I get pregnant this month. I fear for other people lives if I have to take another round of Clomid.

take the virgin-whore dichotomy quiz.


and go to mewing.net. where we're all studs.

Clomid Day One

Well first pill was this morning. Not feeling to bad. I don't know quite what I am expecting to happen. Well other than getting pregnant. I DO expect that to happen. I was a bit nauseous in the mid morning which I contribute to the clomid. I forgot to take my BBT this morning. Oh well.

In other news, last night I became a Mary Kay consultant. Yes I know this sounds very corny. "ding dong! Avon calling!" But I figure, hey I've already have three jobs on top of trying to keep up with my house, what's one more? Yes the job count for me is up to five: a) my job at the hospital, b) babysitting/dogsitting, c) cleaning houses, d) mary kay, e) taking care of my hunny, dogs, and house. How the hell did my mother do it? Props to her. I'm EXHAUSTED!

This morning we went to Wells Fargo and got a home mortagage!!!! People keep telling me, "congratulations! you're in debt for the next 30 years!!!" WOOHOO~! :)

Bad news struck home today. Am I going to lose my job? We are so slow in surgery tomorrow that they gave me the day off. I have mixed emotions. If we are slow that isn't good because we need to be busy so I can keep my job. On the other hand, I need a day off! :) I'm going to do all of my laundry tonight. In the morning I have a house to clean, and afterwards I'm just going to veg out! Maybe I'll get outside in my yard and do some work, but it's highly doubtful! Also dh informed me that I have webspace on insightbb.com so I can upload some pictures to share with you lovely people! yay! :)

Okay time to get moving. Oh and by the way, Anyone want to buy some Mary Kay products? You know you do! ;)

The blood test was a big fat negative. :( So we are starting a new game...clomid. Let's pray it only takes one month guys. **fingers crossed**

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Slob:: -by Pig
2. 60:: seconds
3. Personals:: Ad
4. Famous:: Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
5. Cancer:: July
6. Internet:: Blog
7. Previously:: Known
8. Moonshine:: Really Drunk
9. Ants:: in your pants!
10.Check:: book

It's late but I am updating for Rachel. :) She wanted to know how things went. The cheesecake is delicious... yum. I didn't make the bread because I didn't have apple juice and didn't want to go get any. How is that for lazy? If anybody wanted to know if I'm pregnant ( ;) ) I still don't know! I know the suspense is horrible, isn't it? I went this morning and had my blood drawn.

If you remember, I started taking Prometrium (progesterone) around March 20th or so. I took the progesterone for 23 days with my last dose ending on April 11. :) It is now April 26 and AF has not arrived. This suggests that I may be pregnant. I've taken two HPT now and they have both been negative, but my doctor still wanted the bloodwork done. I found this link though and don't know how to feel about it... Progesterone and No Period. What do you think that means?

It's cold and icky out. Yuck. I'm home from work early. Spent all day trying to teach people the new computer system. Yee haw. I go tomorrow to the hospital to get my blood drawn. Then they will find out if I am pregnant and if so how pregnant I am. Keep your fingers crossed that there is a little pea growing in there. DH is praying cause he doesn't want to do clomid. Since we know my cousin is having triplets and she was on clomid he is a bit scared hehehe. :) I'm more scared of carrying twins and of the risks to me but mostly to babies. :)

I'm making cheesecake right now. And cinnamon apple bread (it's fabulous served warm with butter sugar and cinnamon on top) and brown rice. :) Leftover ham will also be served sometime tonight and I need to do laundry! :) I'll write more later tonight or tomorrow! :)

To take a test or not... that is the question.

Tomorrow is Thursday. One week since the last prego test. Should I take it? I hate the disappointment. I don't know. Hm.... What do you guys think? Should I take the test in the morning?

I apologize for being MIA this week. I'll try and be better. I'm going to rewrite what I wrote yesterday just making sure to save frequently! I only have about 15 minutes. Okay I last wrote on Thursday. Friday I cleaned a house, went to my "normal" job, and then went to babysit. The house wasn't to terribly awful. I would consider it somewhat picked up except in areas where kids are at. It mainly needed dusting and such. I ran out of time so I'll go earlier next week and work on more details. I think by the end of next time or the time after it will be in an excellent condition and more easily maintained. :) I didn't get to blog Friday night because by the time the day was over I was exhausted and went straight to bed!

On Saturday morning, we went to breakfast with my grandparents. We really enjoy eating with them! Afterwards all of us went for a walk in the cemetery with the dogs. My older dog, Gracy, loves to go to the cemetery and chase moles! Ella loves the wide open space to run in. Saturday evening we went and babysat for the usual people. We really enjoy their kids and the 5month old daughter now recognizes us. The little boy adores my husband and the little girl loves to coo and giggle at him. It is so fun to watch him interact with the babies. :) Makes my heart swell. I want to give him one so badly.

Nothing else new. I continue to dislike my job with each passing day. I think if I only had one day off in the middle of the week it would make all of the difference. I would be able to run errands and tend to the house. Once we get the debt paid off I think I am definitely scaling back to partime. After we have a baby I don't intend to work at all. :) Yay! Something to look forward to.

The doctor has prescribed clomid for me. Now if AF would ever arrive it would help. I took my last dose of Progesterone on April 11 so I should have started AF by now. I took a test on the 17th and it was negative so maybe I'll take another one tonight. The doctor is supposed to call today. She may want me to have some bloodwork done. I'm tired of it. I really have just tried to forget about AF. **sigh**

Well I'm off to a meeting now. I'm going to try to get off of work early tonight. Wish me luck. My tummy hurts! :)

Sunday we worked on the house getting it ready for company and I spent most of the day in the kitchen. We had Easter dinner around 4pm. My mom and stepdad, grandparents, and brother in law came. We had spiral ham, corn casserole, green bean casserole, sour cream potatoes, and rolls. Mmmm...

We've been taking lots of walks lately. It has been fun and the dogs really enjoy it. Besides that the exercise makes me feel thin. :)

Okay I'm mad now I had just gone into this HUGE entry and the computer shut itself down. Urghh.. I don't think have time to repeat all of that. I should have saved it before I lost it, dangit.

I'm gonna be okay I think. AF hasn't arrived yet the OBGYN said it is okay for now. Hold out, if it doesn't come in a week, take another test. Do these people realize how long a freaking week is? Obviously not, they are probably one of those people that get pregnant just because they kissed their husband. :( (nothing against those of you who have no trouble getting prego) She did however call in a prescription for Clomid. I asked for it. I'm tired of this. Emotionally I just can't take it. I know that I haven't gone through this nearly as long as everyone else. You all are so brave. It's just that with my previous hx of depression and such, I just don't know how much more of it that I can take before it drives me into the ground for good. I need a bit of happiness. In fact, I deserve a little happiness. We all do. We just don't realize it. But we should though. We are all wonderful.

I told dh this morning to not worry about multiples. I'm not taking shots of clomid, just the oral version *that is if AF ever decides to come* which should lower the risks of multiple births. My rational to him was that if we can't get one what makes him think we would get two? Though deep down inside I think twins would be cool, though a ton of trouble, considering I already have Ella (my puppy!) who thinks that I am her mom. She is so big! She turned 1 year old this month!! Right now Ella is sitting in the chair a few feet away from me. She is pretty tired. Me too. I should go to bed.

Tomorrow I have to get up at the crack of dawn to clean a house. Then I'm off to work, and afterwards, I'm going to babysit. **yawn** I'm tired just thinking about it. Oh! My stepdad is having surgery on his spine tomorrow (they are going through his neck! eek!). So please keep him in your thoughts. I told him it was a walk in the park and for the most part should be easy for him since he'll be knocked out. (thank God for propofol!) heh I also told him it's like walking across the street, millions do it every day. Although once in a while one will get hit by a gravel truck. ROTFL Thank goodness he thought it was funny. :)

Okay off to bed. And if you guys don't mind, will you still keep hoping that I'm pregnant? I know that it's a shot in the dark but maybe it could happen, right Lily? ;) If not, hope that this clomid works right away! Good night and sweet dreams to all. I sometimes wish I could meet every one of you fabulous women who share your lives with me. You guys are truly awesome. Kind of like a sorority (right Dawn?) :) Kappa Kappa Blog *heh I crack myself up!*

It was negative. And quite frankly I wish I hadn't taken it. I knew I wasn't. This just made it more real to me. Depressing.

It didn't work. I took a "generic" pregnancy test this morning and didn't get anything. No lines. Dh asks, "what does that mean?" It means it didn't work, try again next time. I go downstairs and start playing on the computer. A few minutes later ( I believe when he realized it was a generic test) I hear him yelling " Why didn't you buy the expensive test? These are just like throwing money down the drain!" This is funny when you know that my husband is the cheapest man on this Earth. If it comes in generic, he buys it. He would even buy the hard scratchy 1-ply toilet paper if I let him. (And believe me he has tried!)

So today after work I went to Sam's Club and bought a ham and pregnancy tests. 3 EPT tests to be exact. And they were only $15 bucks! For three of them! What a deal! :)

I've been really sore lately and extremely tired. I haven't a clue as to why. Most people are convinced I'm pregnant. I'm not though. I don't think I am to be truthful. It seems like this far off concept that my body is not capable of achieving. Hopefully I'll be morbidly wrong.

Speaking of morbid *hehe* todays inservice at work was presented by a deputy coroner of Marion County (Indianapolis). He gave a very interesting presentation along with very detailed pictures of maggots and mice and people eating dogs. Lovely. Now when I write this I'm feeling great but at the time I felt very sick. Very very sick. (which also led others to believe I am prego) Anyways as he is showing these pictures I'm looking for the nearest exit because I think I have to puke which to be honest is amazing because things like that don't usually make me puke. People puking makes me puke. Not pictures. Not even pictures of decomposing, maggot infested bodies. But enough about that.

So I've got these three EPT tests. I guess I'll wait till morning. Yeah, I'll wait till morning. :) Goodnight ladies and gents, sweet dreams.

I'm still not feeling like myself. :( AF has not shown up and I'm having mixed emotions. I know that if I take a pregnancy test then I'll know but that will bring on even more emotions. For example, if I'm not pregnant besides the fact that I will be terribly upset, I will be worried and anxious as to why I haven't had AF. If I am I'll be so elated that I might actually bust and feel happy. I think I'll go home early today and take the test while dh isn't around. I don't know why but I really feel like it is something I need to do by myself. Is that weird?

My husband found out that he can graduate by December with a degree in general studies. Yeah, it isn't finance and business like he wants, but at least he will have a degree and a chance to either move up in the company he is currently in or change companies. So that is exciting. I'll have to throw him a graduation party. Hopefully by then we will have baby on the way! And I can go back to school and get my degree. **sigh**

It was already 70 degrees when I came here this morning. The awful part about my job is that there are no windows whatsoever. I feel like I am trapped inside a pit. I just want to be home. And I'm absolutely exhausted.

More on my dream. Remember the dream I told you yesterday? Well last night I was fiddling around on the computer trying to pass some time. I went to babycenter and entered in the first day of my last period just for the heck of it! Well that was March 7 and it comes up to say (that if I was pregnant) I would be five weeks pregnant just like in the dream!!! Is that weird? I know that is probably just like some subconscious dream calendar that I have in my head but that is a pretty funky coincedence in my eyes. Could it actually be that I'm pregnant? It's almost a concept my brain can't comprehend. Now if I could only get home to that test...

I'm a bit on the anxious side. Completely irritated and sick of work. I know I say this everyday but I really and truly am sick of it all. I'm not liking the people or the hours or the inconvience. I just want to be home. I think a part of the reason I am anxious is because I'm late. I took my last dose of progesterone on Friday. I should have started by now. That whole Progesterone withdraw thing should have kicked in. But here I sit, Monday afternoon, and AF is no where to be seen. Someone said to take a test but I don't think they realize how hard it is to take a pregnancy test and find out you aren't pregnant. The disappointment is almost unbearable.

I had this dream a few days ago. In the dream I was five weeks pregnant and talking with this girl at work who is also pregnant. The thing that is odd is that this chick and I NEVER talk to each other. I don't think I've ever even said hi to the lady. Weird, huh? And the dream was the kind of dream that was so real. I woke up with a smile on my face just to realize that it was a dream. Only a dream. How sad.

Now if you'll excuse me I must go back to the pit of hell some call work.

Unconscious Mutterings

Compassionate:: Friend
Zodiac:: Sign
Suit:: Zoot
Marble:: Swallow *remember I work in surgery, we usually go after a marble once a week*
Track::Race
Miscellaneous:: Crap
Supermarket:: Sweep
Stone:: Cold
Daylight:: Savings Time
Cap:: Bottle

OUCH! I think I have a UTI. :( I was doing a bit of reading about them and the hubby wanted to know how I got it. Causes are frequent intercourse or pregnancy *and short ureters(girls have shorter ureters than boys)* Hmmm gee maybe I'm pregnant?

Highly doubtful. I know this doesn't sound optimistic but I'm beginning to think that that concept is impossible.

There's no place like home **tap, tap, tap** There's no place like home **tap, tap, tap**....

I want to go home! Work is becoming more boring by the minute. I hate this shift. I don't really giving a flying crap if everybody had to work this shift when they started. It absolutely sucks. Dan had a heart attack which means I may move up to his 7 to 1500 shift while he is away which could be a good thing (obviously not him having a heart attack but me going to days). Maybe once I get there they will see how they don't need me till 1900 and let me work 9a to 5p like I've been begging to. Or maybe they would let me work 10 hour shifts 9a to 1900 and let me have a day of rest. I get nothing done on this shift.

I have so much stuff I want to do at home. I want to work on my sofa covers. Did I tell you that my grandma gave me the old couch my mother had? I put it in the basement in the family room. I want to slipcover that and the sofa in the formal living room. I want to make the blinds with cloth tapes on them for the master bedroom and curtains for the formal living room. I want the blinds in the living room replaced also. I WANT TO GET PREGNANT SO I CAN DECORATE THE SPARE BEDROOM! Obviously the baby would be with us for a long time in our room but he will eventually need a room of his own.

I want it to be warm so I can go out and work in the flower beds and on my pond with the waterfall. I want to put window boxes up outside on the windows that face the deck. I want to paint the picnic table my stepdad gave us.

I want even go into the redecorating I want to do in the kitchen. Sheesh! :) It's time to take the house I grew up in and make it the house I create a home in for my family.

And damnit, I can't do that while I am here at work! I'm going back now to bust my butt and get out of here early! Besides having a few errands to run, it's Thursday. And we all know what that means! PRIME TIME TV!

Suzanne is a Broccoli-Eating Moon Monkey ...with a Battle Rating of 7.3 To see if your Food-Eating Battle Monkey can defeat Suzanne, enter your name:

Yet another Dawn quiz!


You're Betty Grable!


What Classic Pin-Up Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Many thanks to all the ladies who left me comments the other day during my "breakdown" It meant tons. :) And a special thanks to BabyBaby for calling me a princess. I once read a sign that said "sometimes you just have to be the princess you really are" :) And remember BabyBaby, good things come to those who wait. And this may be the only time I am somewhat patient. You are in my prayers and Congratulations! You deserve it!

It's been busy around here! :) Work is slow though and I came home early and hung out with my mother. I ran to Sam's Club and bought a jacket for Papa; tomorrow is his 73rd birthday! The jacket was a nice "three season" with thermal lining. Thought it might come in handy for this crazy Indiana weather and it was only $12! Not that I wouldn't spend tons on my Papa because he is awesome, but we are on a budget people! That and they come over for breakfast like every other day (impending on a princess's(?) (***dangit where is that little cartoon beanmom found when I need it!***) beauty rest BabyBaby!) Yes, they are coming for breakfast in the morning. Buttermilk pancakes, sausage, and eggs I believe. OJ and coffee will also be served. Just call me Suzy Homemaker (although I hate for my name to be shortened) Everybody at work calls me that.

Did I mention that my Papa is the greatest? Him and my father were really close. My dad was his only biological son (they have 6 kids, the first three were from my grandmas previous marriage. From what I hear, the other dude was a real jerk.) We told Papa that the first son we got we were planning on naming Kevin Clayton *** *** after my father. We would have my maiden name and my married name at the end. So it would kinda be like he has two middle names like me. I just tacked my married name on the end without the hyphen! Four really long long names. I must have been crazy! Sometimes I wish I would have met a Smith or Brown or something even shorter. But heck, what fun would it be to go through life with a boring name like Smith or Brown (truly no offense meant to anyone!)? Okay I'm babbling. I'm off to bed. Suzy Homemaker has to be up early to make the world breakfast...

Can we say "robbing the cradle?"

I just finished im'ing with Dawn. She is a neat girl! :) And we are both freaks ;) Isn't bonding with other freaks like yourself just grand?

Hello American Express! Let me tell you a few things.

1) My husband and I are married. We are one. This means that he nor I are primary cardholders. We use the card together and we both pay the bill together.

2) He doesn't allow me to use his password nor does he allow me to use the card. As a matter of fact, I'm the one who holds the checkbook.

3) In the future, kissing the butt of the spouse of the primary cardholder will do you a mountain of good.

It's been a real pleasure doing business with you.

Dawn always finds the neat quizzes! :)





Which of Henry VIII's wives are you?

this quiz was made by the groovy ghouls at Spookbot

My shoes arrived!

I can't take it anymore. Here it is 1am, I'm supposed to be at work in less than eight hours, and I sit here crying because I'm not pregnant. My dh came home and told me that yet another person we know is pregnant. And I really just can't take it! I hurt so bad. I don't know what to do. I have no clue how these women try for years and years and years without success. I feel like this horrible horrible failure. I feel like it is never going to happen. I feel like all this time and effort and pain and meticulous steps are all in vain. Yay I'm not going to die for cervical cancer but since I'm allowing you to live (says God) you can have no babies.

No babies. The two words that frighten me. Those words plague my sleep, threaten lifelong saddness. Could it be that I will never hear the pitter patter of tiny feet running through my house? Will I never look out the window and see my dh playing with my babies and the dogs? WIll I never feel that kick from within, never experience that miracles that only others seem to be doing?

I feel like it's unfair. I feel like I don't deserve this. Hasn't my life been hard enough? I watched my dad die in two weeks from a rare, toxic blood disease when I was nine. I've worked since I was 13, fulltime since I was 16. I never got to do what others did after school, because I was wiping butts in nursing homes. I've missed out on so much. My dad didn't teach me to drive, he never met a date, he didn't see my graduate high school, or even help me move out the first time. Worst of all he didn't walk me down the aisle. The one most important moment in a girls life he was not there. And I MISS him. Damnit! I just want to run and scream.

Why can't this one thing be easy? WHY!? I found out today, in addition to that friend, that this chick at work is pregnant. Not married, and pregnant. And it feels so UNFAIR! I want to scream, "I'm doing it the right way! I'm married! I've found a nice stable home, with a stable guy!" "Are you there God, it's me, Suzanne. Please help! HELP HELP HELP!"

This pain is the worst. The emptiness.Maybe this outrage is just sparked by the extra progesterone they have me on. Or maybe it is the reality that is setting in. Childless Suzanne. I should forget about it. They say stupid stuff like, it happens when you least expect it, or when you arent' trying. Bullcrap. I'm tired of not trying, and I'm tired of trying. Heck, I'm just plain tired. And now all my blog readers think I'm psycho. Damnit.

I'm listed in Blogshares! Go, run, play! :)

Blogger is having issues. That's all I have to say about that.

Life can be so boring sometimes. My weekend came and went to fast. Saturday we ran some errands and then babysat in the evening. Sunday we went to Menards and returned some things. We then bought a prefabricated cabinet and paint and a countertop to go on it (butcher block). We assembled it and made it into our own little buffet to put the hutch on. I really like it too! It is painted a green called cactus green. Kind of resembles a lime cactus color though. :) If I ever find a place to post pictures I'll make sure and get one up so you can see it!

Today was boring at work. We are still really slow with Spring Break. I was done working at 4pm and then had to dodge my supervisor so I wouldn't get sent home. I'm now waiting for my dh. He should be here any minute and I wish he would hurry up! I am starving! I've debated walking across the street to Fazoli's to get something to eat but procrastinated because I don't have my phone with me or the coupons I found for Fazoli's. I'm thinking that some time this week I'm going to get a good book and go over there and have ahuge plate of spaghetti, read, and mooch off of the free breadsticks! :) Maybe he is on his way now... I'll go check.

I'm such a follower!

Unconscious Mutterings

Smell :: Food!
Caramel :: Sundae
Parallel :: Park
Miami :: Beach
Sleep :: Walk
Double :: Dutch
Kiss :: French
History :: War
Vodka :: Daquiri
Click :: Your Mouse

This has been an awfully long week. I clocked a half hour overtime on monday and another half hour today. The husband and I have been carpooling on Monday thru Thursday (did I mention that before?) since gas prices went up. They are coming back down but it is nice to have the time together during the week. :) Not to mention that it is saving bunches of money by not driving the truck everyday. It is expensive to fill that thing! We carpooled today because I am a fool. I get off of work at 19:20 (7:20pm) and he generally gets off between 20:00 and 20:30 (8 and 8:30). Which by the time he gets to where I work, is an hour and a half or so that I wait. I come down here to the library and surf the web, try to post, and catch up on the blogs I can read here from work (some of them are filtered out because of network stupidity.) Today, even though I worked a bit later, I've been waiting what seems like FOREVER!

I did sign up for a blogrolling account. I've added it to my template but I can't see if it works because my blog is one of the "stupidly filtered out blogs." I've been meaning to add a list of links so that people could see who I read and to pay tribute to the wonderful ladies who share their lives with me. But let's face it, I'm HTML stupid and I don't ever seem to have the time anymore.

Exciting baby news is that I bought my Basal Thermometer a few days ago and my temperature spiked this morning. I'm taking it that I'm ovulating considering AF left last weekend. (yes that's right, AF was in town for about twenty days!!!)_We've "taken the necessary steps" to become pregnant (he!he!he!) and now I'm crossing my fingers. I was so excited about the thermometer but even seeing it spike on the graph I started at Fertility Friend has made me giddy and given me a brighter outlook on life! yay!

I have a whole stack of coupons I need to cut out (I swiped them from the coupon box at work. I swear I am the only one that takes coupons out of that thing!) And I want to go to the potty. Everybody have fabulous weekends! I'll try to write more often (I know I say that everytime!) Honestly if I didn't have the stupidest shift in the world (11a-19:20p) then life would be a hell of a lot easier. I'm keeping my fingers crossed that a day shift pops up SOON!

Wow.

Last night was just plain awful. After I wrote last I finished up my lunch hour and went back to the floor and got my evening assignment. I go to check on my rooms and they are having problems and send me up for blood. This pattern continues about four times which equaled 9 units of blood, 1 unit platelets, and 2 units plasma. They started a code and called it about 30 minutes later. :( I always cleaned up dead bodies in nursing homes. Other people couldn't handle it so they would come and get me to do it for them. It's the least I could do, clean them up as best I could so that they could go to the funeral home. One last farewell from me since I loved all the residents and only wanted the best for them. I think this was different because I watched as we tried to save this persons life. I had awful dreams all last night. Dreams about walking around the morgue and dreams about shrouding (basically putting them in a body bag) people I actually knew. It was a long day. I got in the car at the end of the night looked at my dh and just said nothing. We went home and I made cinnamon rolls and milk for dinner, climbed into bed, and passed out. I don't ever want to relive that again, though I know that I will someday.

I guess it kind of amazes people of the rare instances when people do actually die in surgery. Sure lots of TV shows say thats what happened but the reality isn't there. We have cases that go bad and we take them to ICU in bad shape but they don't die on our table. The nurse I was working with has never lost a patient in 32 years of being an OR nurse until last night. We were all a bit edgy to say the least.

Today was thankfully boring. I didn't do a darn thing past 4 o'clock, which was fine by mean. Though rumor has it that tomorrow at the meeting they are going to be announcing that anyone who has no work to do will be sent home. Sucky. I love going home but now that I'm carpooling four days a week I am stuck here to my husband gets off work. (usually about an hour and a half after I get off) Besides that I need the 40 hours so that I can keep paying bills off in massive quantities!

I just bought a pair of shoes off of Shoebuy. That's where I got the shoes that I wear ALL OF THE TIME, but they died a few days ago (though I am still wearing them). They seam is coming apart and my little toe sticks out. My husband bought them last time so I used his membership. This time though the shoes were a total of $36.38 marked down from $50.95. I found a coupon for 20% off on Fatwallet and got an additional 10% off for registering to be a member. yay! :) I love getting good deals. :)

Okay, I'm off to go check on imacmom, beanmom, and bizarro girl. :) Have a spectacular evening!

Okay I've just been awful at updating this thing. I'm sorry. It really has been quite busy. Friday night after work I went and babysat. We babysat again on Saturday and on Sunday we did construction cleanup (which is mighty hard work.) While doing this exhausting manual labor, dh and I began to wonder why is it that manual labor pays less than desk labor. Yeah, yeah I know desk labor requires a degree but manual labor is reallyhard!

This morning we had my grandfather over for breakfast, which was very nice. We had pancackes, sausage, scrambled eggs, and some strawberries. Yum! :) Saturday evening we went and did grocery shopping for the entire month. With our coupons (which were doubled by the store) and the ad savings we saved a total of $40 off of our grocery bill. It was quite lovely. :)

Health wise I am kind of at a standstill. Last week the doctor gave me progesterone which would stop the bleeding (period), but although the bleeding has slowed down, it hasn't stopped. At least I'm not feeling like I am bleeding to death (like I did last week) but seeing that I've now been bleeding for 24 days(!) something really needs to happen. Everybody seems to think that a D&C would help and lots of people have them and then become pregnant almost directly afterwards. But let me remind you that I work in surgery and I do have faith in the people taking care of you but I am scared to death of being put to sleep. I know that it is quite safe and people do it everyday like crossing the street. But let us not forget that some people occasionally get hit when they cross the street!

Even though I don't want to I am calling the doctor. I'm constantly exhausted which could be because I am now anemic from the blood loss. So I really need to give her a heads up, ya know?

I promise to be more faithful and write everyday even if I just don't feel awake enough. I'll force myself to, and usually it makes me feel better and it only takes a few minutes, right?

I picked this up from Dawn:


find your inner PIE @ stvlive.com

Okay, I'm better. I apologize for my mental breakdown yesterday. It has just been a tough road lately. I went to the doctor. It looks like I am not hemoragging and that my body is responding to the glucophage. My insulin is still not normal but has gone down since the last time we tested! yay! She says this is a VERY good sign. They drew my blood for a hemoglobin and though it is on the low side of normal, it is still in the normal range so no D and C. No surgery! Yay! She did make me take today off to just relax and get some sleep and let my body regenerate the nourishment it is losing. She gave me Prometrium, which is progesterone. She thinks that I'm going to get pregnant soon. Yay! So now lets just cross our fingers and hope that I ovulate this month! :) That nap really helped my outlook on stuff today, can you tell? Still tired but not as exhausted as I have been feeling!

I'm an awful awful person. My mother told me today that my cousin is finally pregnant. She has had about three failed attempts at artificial insemination. And I really and truly happy for her, it's just that is so hard. I want to be pregnant so bad. I want a baby in the worst way. I want to call her but I don't want her to feel sorry for me or feel weird. I have been doing so well now that I got my period but that was eleven days ago and I'm still bleeding heavily. Which is bad. I'm going to the doctor tomorrow because Melissa made me. The worst case scenario is that my hemoglobin is really low and I'll need blood and-or surgery to get everything out and hopefully be like brand new. Everybody at work is pregnant. And I do mean everybody. I've never wanted more in my entire life then babies.It is supposed to be so damn simple. You grow up, go to school, get married, have babies. That is the natural progression, right? So why is the one thing that I want more than anything in the world is the one thing that my body is having trouble doing.I can't take it anymore. There are so many people out there that don't want babies or think that babies are a burden and I'd give anything to be pregnant right now. I don't won't surgery, and I don't want to be admitted to the hospital. I want the bleeding to stop, to ovulate, get pregnant, and be done with it. I'm so absolutely sick of going to the OBGYN. I swear my insurance company is sending her kids to college. Why can't I just catch a break? First it was the cervical cancer now the polycystic ovary syndrome. I'm so absolutely tired emotionally and physically. Probably physically because i'm freaking bleeding to death! Though there is some good news that the first pap they did after my surgery showed everything as normal. Two more normal ones and I'll be home free, which means just going once a year which would be grand. That was great news. Now if I can only get out of this without a blood transfusion and surgery. Please keep me in your thoughts, I can't keep up with this much longer...

I'm on call all of this week. I haven't been called in yet, but I find myself waking up a lot at night because I'm worried the pager will go off and I won't hear it! That would be bad. I got here to work today and found out that the night shift guy had called in for tonight! Not good, since I'm on call , that means I have to be here. But another lady volunteered to go home now and come and work tonight. yay! I could have worked it, but that would mean I get off tonight at 7:20 then clock back in at 10pm then out at 6am then in again at 11am and out again at 720 pm. I would have been a walking zombie! Plus, I would miss my husband and puppies to much.

It's wednesday so we have our meeting today. It is usually quite boring and since it is directly after lunch, I always want to take a nap while in there. Oh well. Hopefully time will pass quickly and 7 will be here so I can go home. Lately I just have not been in the mood to work. I'm tired of all the petty whining and bickering between people. Sick of people worrying if they are going to have to do more work than another person. It's ridiculous! I thought I had left that all behind in elementary school. Apparently I was morbidly mistaken. Okay off to the meeting. I hope everybody else has a fabulous day in comparison to mine! :)

Sorry I haven't posted in a while. It was a very long weekend! We didn't do a whole lot. I took Gracy, my older dog, to the vet Saturday am. She is eleven years old! :) They said that whatever we were doing was good because she looks to be in better health than she was last year! yay! She got her shots and a treat and we were on our way. Went to the local police station to register the dogs. I always do that so I can say they are legal and if Ella gets away before we install the invisible fence I want her back! Gracy was never really a problem until recently with wondering. We always just let her out the door and she does her business and comes back. Lately though, if we don't come back and call her in right away she starts to wonder around which isn't good, because I don't want her to get hit!

Sunday I cleaned house for a lady at work! OMG! If I ever thought that my house was dirty I was terribly mistaken! She had dust bunnies the size of soccer balls and cat hair everywhere. I know that my dogs shed (and I have two of them) but this was just plain ridiculous! There was also dried up cat puke all over the house including underneath her bed and on her sheets. I just don't see how some people can live like that?! It wore me out big time, so afterwards I treated my dh and myself to a steak dinner at Texas Roadhouse.

I joined another webring. This one is called Waiting in Faith. It is for PCOS patients trying to concieve. Hopefully I will hear good news from them as opposed to all of the bad statistics I read on the internet which I have stopped reading. I don't like to hear it so I don't do it anymore. All part of my being optomistc plan. :)

Today I'm at work and it is really slow. We only have 12 cases to do today. We usually do close to 40. So I went to half price books and bought the Vagina Monologues. I've been meaning to read it for a while now. If anyone wants to buy it from me for say $7 just let me know. :) I should be done with it by tomorrow since it isn't a long book and I will be here until 7pm tonight with nothing to do. Well I have to get back to work unfortunately. Hopefully my life will get more exciting soon.

This was fun! :)


How evil are you?

I would like to have a moment of silence for dear Jennifer's cat, Chincey, who passed away this morning. :( Pets are gifts to us and become not just our companions but a member of the family. They weep with us when loved ones pass and rejoice with us during the happier times in life. My dogs have given me everything in the world. My oldest, given to me by my late father, saw me through his death and has been there forever. Ella, my puppy, continues to bring joy to me everytime I walk into the room. She thinks of me as mom and is teaching my husband to be a great father. And as much as she, or any other pet, annoys me, chews up my cell phone, or poops on the floor because she just can't hold it anymore, we wouldn't give them up for anything in the world. I know Jennifer and Anth must be feeling something awful. So let's send good thoughts there way with this moment of silence, remember the pets we have lost before, and dear Chincey. **silence**

Oh my gosh! I'm so happy! ***Note to reader: If you in anyway don't want to get up close and personal with me then I suggest skipping this entry. Remember that I don't have to post things that make others happy, this a documentation of my own life, my own journal by which you are choosing to celebrate the happenings in my life. :) Thank you for doing so! But as before mentioned, if you don't want to know the very nitty gritty don't read this entry! Tune in tomorrow! :) ***

AF arrived today. I haven't been visited by AF regularly since I stopped birth control in June. She last made a visit in November with the little aid of provera *drugs*. But today she came by herself *obviously prompted by the lower insulin levels due to the glucophage* and I welcomed her home with loving arms. To be truthful, as awful as she can sometimes be, I missed her terribly. All girls know this, even if they don't want babies. When you are growing up, you wait for the day that AF makes an appearance in your life. SHE is your defining moment of when you became a woman. Health class revolved around this one proud shining moment for many years! And when she finally came you felt like you could put your "training bra" on and walk with pride. :) You were now a true woman! AF, I've missed you so much. And as much as you are welcome, I would like a baby first, then for you to come and visit again on a regular basis. If you will all excuse me, I'm going to find my training bra to walk with pride...

I spent last night in the Emergency Room. Yesterday I went to work, didn't feel well, but went anyway. By 7:30 my stomach was cramping horribly. I took some medicine and walked around and such. By 12:30 I couldn't bare it anymore. By this time I had vomited and was literally at my wits end. I went to the ER, they gave me a pregnancy test, negative :(, and drew blood. My white blood cell count is 17,000 *very high* and my tummy is tender to touch everywhere. The high white blood cell count means that there is an infection somewhere. After two sticks for an IV, two morphine pushes, some phenegran, xrays, and a ct scan, they don't think it is appendicitis. Not to sure though. :(

Today I had to take the day off of work considering that I was very sick last night and had been in the ER until 5am. I went to my family doctor and she drew more blood. If my tummy doesn't get any better , it is still really tender to touch, then I should go see her again. She is checking to make sure my white blood cells are going down if not she'll do more tests. :( I don't want to have an appendectomy. Working in surgery has just made me even more scared of surgery because the unknown is all known. I have complete faith that they would take care of me and such but it's just scary. I'm afraid that if the pain doesn't go away or if it gets as severe again as it was last night that they will take my appendix just in case. I really don't know what else it could be. The plus side, they gave me some nice drugs to chase the bad pain away. The bad side, my tummy still really aches and I'm really sore and I have to go back to work tomorrow. I'm gonna go play some Sims, hopefully it will make me feel better. ;)

So yesterday morning before work I went down to the laundry room to work on (you guessed it!) laundry! So I put the clothes in the dryer and started up the washer and measuring soaps and such and went upstairs and went to work. When I got home I went downstairs, folded the clothes in the dryer, and opened up the washer and... there weren't any clothes in there. At this point I'm confused, I know that dryers eat socks, but the washer eating an entire load of laundry? That's ridiculous. Well folks, it turns out that I just forgot to put clothes in the washer. Yup, I ran an entire cycle with soap but no clothes! It's official, I've lost my mind...

Sometimes I just feel dumb. Downright stupid. The ladies I sit and eat lunch with at work were talking about the stock market and real estate and mortgages. I'm just now learning about mortgages and for the most part I still leave it up to my husband. Yes, I have the checkbook and I pay the bills and such but we really figure out where the money is going together. I rely on him to know the stuff about mortgages, the stock market, and what's going on in the world. And I hate it sometimes that I am more comfortable just keeping the house going, making sure everything is clean and that everybody has a full belly. Is that wrong? Should I be more "liberated" and "self-empowering" and learn this stuff? With the war stuff, I am such a worrier that "ignorance is really bliss" for me. Now I can debate some stuff. And I can carry on full conversations with you on the pros and cons of abortion, religion, immigration and lots of other colorful things. And I can get really charged up talking about this stuff. Is that enough though? As I said a couple of days ago, I hate feeling stupid and made to look stupid. And lately it has been happening a lot. And to be very honest, it's starting to piss me off!

So since my last post I have conquered the next goal in Sims! Finished up cleaning the living room (which was the zone for this week), and started laundry. Currently working on that while playing openended Sims (no levels, no goals, just playing) on the freeall cheat mode with my husband. :) This cheat lets you buy anything and everything for free! :) I love my strategy book!

So today I've mainly cleaned and played Sims. We went to Kokomo and did a bit of shopping. We bought three playstation2 games from Target (buy two at $19.99 get one free!) and a Sims for Playstation2 strategy guide. The strategy guide has made all of the difference and allowed me to conquer the level I had been stuck at. :)

Thought I would share this with you. Today we were walking through Sam's Club and I'm telling my husband about my week. I was telling him how this chick at work eats Grape jolly ranchers all of the time and it makes me absolutely just want to puke. And the other day he put BBQ sauce on his pepperoni pizza and that thought plus the smell made me puke. So we are walking through Sams and there are all of these deserts and such and I just want to eat them! Mind you, I'm not much of a sweet/desert kind of person, especially since they put me on MetforminXR (glucophage). At this time I realize that I have to go to the batheroom (for like the tenth time in three hours). He asks me "are you pregnant?"

This catches my surprise for a few reasons. A) I haven't even thought about it. Most of the time I'm telling myself that I should just give up because it won't happen. B) I realize that I still haven't gotten my period and on Monday it will be four weeks since starting the glucophage. I get my blood redrawn to check insulin levels on Friday. C) In the past it has always been me who suggested that I was pregnant. He never suggests it. D) I've been having really bizarre vivid dreams lately. And I'm having a recurring dream about a baby girl. In the dream, she is so real that I can smell her and my heart and breast ache when she cries. It is absolutely the weirdest thing.

So maybe quite possibly God has shown his loving face upon us and is sending me a baby. I sure hope so. :)

The Friday Five

1. What is your favorite type of literature to read (magazine, newspaper, novels, nonfiction, poetry, etc.)?
I prefer fiction. I like getting lost in a different life, which is probably why I love the stage, acting, and performing. I currently subscribe to REDBOOK, just because it always has neat ideas for working ladies. :) I finally fit into that married category.

2. What is your favorite novel?
I absolutely LOVE "She's Come Undone" by Wally Lamb. EVERYONE SHOULD READ IT! I've read it at least 15 times, and I think I'll go pull it off the shelf and start it again. :) I always get something new from it.

3. Do you have a favorite poem? (Share it!)
My favorite peom is "Ad Finem" by Ella Wheeler Wilcox.

AD FINEM

On the white throat of the useless passion
That scorched my soul with its burning breath,
I clutched my fingers in murderous fashion,
And gathered them close in a grip of death;
For why should I fan, or feed with fuel,
A love that showed me but blank despair?
So my hold was firm, and my grasp was cruel--
I meant to strangle it then and there!

I thought it was dead. But with no warning,
It rose from its grave last night, and came
And stood by my bed till the early morning,
And over and over it spoke your name.
Its throat was red where my hands had held it,
It burned my brow with its scorching breath;
And I said, the moment my eyes beheld it,
"A love like this can know no death."

For just one kiss that your lips have given
In the lost and beautiful past to me,
I would gladly barter my hopes of Heaven
And all the bliss of Eternity.
For never a joy are the angels keeping
To lay at my feet in Paradise,
Like that of into your strong arms creeping,
And looking into your love-lit eyes.

I know, in the way that sins are reckoned,
This thought is a sin of the deepest dye;
But I know, too, if an angel beckoned,
Standing close by the Throne on High,
And you, adown by the gates infernal,
Should open your loving arms and smile,
I would turn my back on things supernal,
To lie on your breast a little while.

To know for an hour you were mine completely--
Mine in body and soul, my own--
I would bear unending tortures sweetly,
With not a murmur and not a moan.
A lighter sin or a lesser error
Might change through hope or fear divine;
But there is no fear, and hell has no terror
To change or alter a love like mine.

Poems of Passion by Ella Wheeler
Chicago : Belford, Clarke & Co, 1883


4. What is one thing you've always wanted to read, or wish you had more time to read?
More books!

5. What are you currently reading?
Catching up on Redbooks before I a) find a book I want to read and b) find the money in which to pay for the book I want to read.

Yesterday was awful. I hate that people see me as not being as intelligent as they are just because I hold a job below them. Do they not realize that I am working towards a degree? Do they not realize that not only did I graduate high school, but that I went to a very sophisticated private school. I went to DePauw University. It is ranked in the top 50 schools in America. Only the best of the best survive. I have also been a nurse aide since I was 16. I know my way around. I have been very good at learning this job. I always listen and observe in an effort to learn. I have taken classes to learn about aseptic technique, positioning the patient for surgery, and prepping the surgical site. I am efficient in and outside the OR. A lot of times, I know how to find different things and tools in the OR that even the nurse doesn't know. So why do you treat me badly? Why don't you recognize that I am a human being, an adult, someone who understands English? In fact, I'm bilingual! I'm an important tool that makes your job all the easier. Yet you spit on me. You insult me by explaining things to me as if I were a child. And it hurts! I would rather you talk to me as if I understood everything you understand and allow me to ask when I feel l don't know. I'll write a more cheerful blog later...

Today has just been awful. :*( Last night we had just climbed into bed when we heard someone pounding on the front door. So, like normal, sane people, we get a bit freaked out because who knocks on the door at 11 o'clock when all the lights are out, right? We worry. There is a man at the front door, says he just got off of work from around the corner, and he just watched this woman hit our truck!!! So we throw on shoes grab our coats and run out there (we park along the street-- no garage or driveway--extremely small town w/ pop. at about 10,000). Sure enough some dumb ***** lady (sorry I'm angry) hit our truck. The tail light is smashed the driver side panel is dented and crunched. But the story gets even better. She took off. That's right folks, a hit and run. So now I'm more upset when Mr. Good Samaritan tells me he got the license plate number and called the cops. AND that the cops had just dug this chick out of a snow drift down the street. Mr. G. Samaritan had watched while waiting for his wife to pick him up from work. So about this time the police car pulls up. (we live about a block away from the police station/fire station, a fact that calms my soul) He says he knows who hit it and they are looking for her and running her plates. :/ So when he left us he was going to her house where they had called her and she was there and had admitted to being in accident. SO WHY THE HECK DID YOU FLEE THE SCENE? Mr. Good Samaritan says that by the way he was driving she looked drunk. Mr. Police Man says that when digging her out of the snow drift she had seemed nervous but didn't notice physical drunkeness but that she had gotten in the car and sped off in a hurry. urggh...

This morning we got up and went to get estimates for repair. They are quoting about $2000. She better have insurance cause if not I'm taking her butt to court. No doubt about it. I don't have the $$$ to fix it myself or pay my deductible and have my insurance go up. Nor do we deserve to have to drive a truck around that's been smashed. She also lost her mirror in the accident. I told the guy at the body shop (who is a close friend of the family) that if a grey Monte Carlo comes in for work and she is missing her passenger side mirror, that I've got it and I'm looking for her!!! Where ever you are Ms. I-drive-a-stinking-Monte-Carlo-and-I-was-drunk-and-hit-poor-suzanne's-husbands-truck-and-took-off-like-a-dumbass I'm looking for you! You have to fix my truck! **anger!**

I've been meaning to share this with you guys, I received it in an email. I hate forwards but thought you would appreciate it. Here goes:


MOM - Job Description

POSITION: Mother, Mom, Mama

JOB DESCRIPTION: Long term, team players needed, for challenging permanent work in an often chaotic environment. Candidates must possess excellent communication and organizational skills and be willing to work variable hours, which will include evenings and weekends and frequent 24 hour shifts on call. Some overnight travel required, including trips to primitive camping sites on rainy weekends and endless sports tournaments in far away cities. Travel expenses not reimbursed. Extensive courier duties also required.

RESPONSIBILITIES: The rest of your life. Must be willing to be hated, at least temporarily, until someone needs $5. Must be willing to bite tongue repeatedly. Also, must possess the physical stamina of a pack mule and be able to go from zero to 60 mph in three seconds flat in case, this time, the screams from the backyard are not someone just crying wolf. Must be willing to face stimulating technical challenges, such as small gadget repair, mysteriously sluggish toilets and stuck zippers. Must screen phone calls, maintain calendars and coordinate production of multiple homework projects. Must have ability to plan and organize social gatherings for clients of all ages and mental outlooks. Must be willing to be indispensable one minute, an embarrassment the next. Must handle assembly and product safety testing of a half million cheap, plastic toys, and battery operated devices. Must always hope for the best but be prepared for the worst. Must assume final, complete accountability for the quality of the end product. Responsibilities also include floor maintenance and janitorial work throughout the facility.

POSSIBILITY FOR ADVANCEMENT & PROMOTION: Virtually none. Your job is to remain in the same position for years, without complaining, constantly retraining and updating your skills, so that those in your charge can ultimately surpass you

PREVIOUS EXPERIENCE: None required unfortunately. On-the-job training offered on a continually exhausting basis.

WAGES AND COMPENSATION: Get this! You pay them! Offering frequent raises and bonuses. A balloon payment is due when they turn 18 because of the assumption that college will help them become financially independent. When you die, you give them whatever is left. The oddest thing about this reverse-salary scheme is that you actually enjoy it and wish you could only do more.

BENEFITS: While no health or dental insurance, no pension, no tuition reimbursement, no paid holidays and no stock options are offered; this job supplies limitless opportunities for personal growth and free hugs for life if you play your cards right.

I am so proud of myself! I have actually been doing what FlyLady says. And when she says to do something that is already done, I do an extra thing in the house like sweep or vacuum. Last night, the husband went with a friend to see a movie. I came home and watched the Joe Millionaire recap (I only actually watched the first episode of JM, the finale, and the recap.), washed dishes, read blogs, cut coupons (in the breakroom at work people bring in coupons that they don't use and put them in a coupon box, I took advantage of it!), washed dishes, set the trash out for pickup this morning (usually a husband job), and walked Ella (usually a husband job!). :) I was so proud that I did so much. I felt like I had accomplished something. This morning I got up and went to the dentist and then vacuumed the living room and entry way. That helps out a lot with the dog hair. Tomorrow I am going to pick up a family friends dog, Bailey. He is pretty cool, just really hangs out. They are going out of town on vacation and I just scooped up the chance to make an extra $100. I really need the cash. Okay break is over! Must get back to work! :) Have a great day!

FYI: Merriam-Webster says that eejitous is not found or not a word! :) I found this really cool website, actually I found it in my REDBOOK magazine, that has been a lot of help lately. I figured I should share it with you, so you can make all of your lives easier! It is REFDESK. Hope it helps!

I'm an irredeemably eejitous, moderate, disgustingly generous, relatively well adjusted human being!
See how compatible you are with me!
Brought to you by Rum and Monkey

I'm sick. YUCK. I have a headache-becoming-a-migraine that has persisted to get worse and worse since last night. My tummy is turning and my head is spinning. I feel like I'm going to toss my cookies. :( Work has been really slow today and it looks like Monday is going to be just as slow. I may have to go home today. Who wants a sick person coming to get them for surgery? It would make me nervous if some obviously sick girl came to get them for a surgery in which their belly would be open and then sick girl would be in the room. Can we say infection?

I joined the FLYLADY group. It sounds like a pretty smart way of getting and keeping the house in shape. My husband is just as excited.

Okay I gotta go "toss my cookies" Sorry for the graphic description, girls. I'll write more later after I take some (baby-safe) drugs. No, I don't know if I am pregnant, I don't think I am, but the OBGYN went ahead and prescribed me baby-safe medicine for my migraines just in case we get there. :) Drugs are a beautiful thing...

I feel like I am just kinda here. It is terribly slow today at work. I'm looking forward to 3:00 though because that is when we get our checks. I would like to just go home then and pay bills! and clean my house, but maybe not. I need to stay here to make money because we need it so desperately. But I hate it when it is slow and I finished my book *by the way it was awesome! you should read it too* I'm going to join this "FLY LADY" person I keep hearing about. I'll give you a link when I get home from work. Tomorrow is supposed to be slow too. I have SO MUCH to do I may slip out of here early but take VTO *voluntary time off. you don't get paid but you get the hours credited to you so you get your retention bonus. the rb comes around quarterly and you have to have worked like at least 500 hours to get it. VTO allows you to go but still get the hours so you get the bonus. And it saves the department money.*
I can't believe it is Thursday. PRIME TIME TV! whoopee. Which is why I'd like to go home early. So I can clean and then sit down with the laundry and watch my shows. Ella got a bath this morning. The husband and I jumped in the shower and had to take her in there with us (so she doesn't find her way into trouble). When we got out I told him to just throw her in too. But the older dog, Gracy, the one who has bladder control issues, needs a bath too. If I got home early I could do that and blow dry her. (it's too cold outside and in our drafty 100 yr old house to leave her wet)
I'm gonna go find the Thursday Thumb Twiddler and see if it is worth completing. I'll talk at you later. Adios....

I didn't take the test. I'm a chicken. :) I think I'm just going to wait it out and stop thinking about it. It's kinda stressing me out which doesn't help the getting pregnant part. So I'm just going to enjoy the "getting" pregnant part **wink wink** and see what happens. :)

Not much of a big day. Went to work and then the Suture Boys took us out to bw3's for happy hour. It was cool to hang out with the people I work with all day. They are a fun group. Not to mention the suture guy Gary is a lot of fun ** I have to suck up to him because 1) he did me a favor and 2) he made me tell him my blogsite addy so he's gonna come visit. :) But he really is cool, and he got lucky on Valentines Day because I gave him a good idea. :) LOL Okay I'm going back to my book. Talk atcha later!

Okay everybody is driving me nuts today. I am not pregnant, if I am, I don't know it. I'm tired of walking the halls at work and seeing big pregnant bellies. And all those babies! I want one! I'm tired of people asking me "are you pregnant?" NO! I AM NOT ******* PREGNANT! I WILL LET YOU KNOW! And there is the other, "heh, well are you doing it right?" urgh. If little girls who haven't graduated high school can concieve I am sure that my husband and myself, two college educated individuals, can concieve. STOP ASKING. IT ISN'T HELPING.

It's my body and it is stupid. Stupid, stupid body. The medicine that is supposed to make my body work right makes me so terribly terribly sick. I hate it. :( But I want a baby so bad. And I might be pregnant. I've been on this medicine almost three weeks. Maybe my body got the message released an egg and my hunny's "swimmers" greeted it with open arms. Okay so that was a bit graphic, but it's highly possible, right? **agree with me, I'm trying to be positive" So with that in mind I bought a pregnancy test. Two to be correct. I figured that if I wasn't I would need one next month. And if the first one was positive, then I would want to take another one to make sure. heh. Think good thoughts and I'll take this test in the morning. I'm so tired of disappointment. And I hate only seeing one line. I hate it. HATE HATE HATE. urgh. I'm gonna get back to my book. ** New book. "Fast Women" by Jennifer Cruise ** I'll see you tomorrow kiddies...

**note to self: must blog more** I've been so wrapped up in my book that nothing in the world matters. Plus, it has been so cold that I just don't feel like doing anything. I did finish my book, I Don't Know How She Does It, which was an AWESOME book. :) I've been doing laundry today and playing the sims. I'm trying to beat the game so I can unlock all of the cool stuff and use it during the open ended version that my husband and I have started. I also need to mop floors but that might have to wait. This house is so big and hard to keep up with. I don't know how my mom did it all those years, except for the fact that she LOVES to clean which probably makes it a lot easier. What the heck are we going to have for dinner/lunch. I would like to go to Superwalmart in Kokomo, IN but since I'm on call for the hospital I can't go that far north in case I get called in. I called them this morning and the call board looked dead so I don't think that I would get called in, but one can never assume, it makes an ass out of u and me. ;) **sigh** I have to go cut coupons out of the Sunday paper, practice the piano *that is fun* and clean.

We did get snow here by the way, it snowed, and snowed, and snowed, and snowed. And today it's supposed to snow, snow, snow, sleet, snow, hail, snow.... And tomorrow.....

Let me start off by saying I'm so sorry I haven't been religious about this lately. I've been reading beanmom, imacmom, and bizarrogirl, Mary and such but haven't really dove into mine. Alot of it would be because I am so incredibly tired. The glucophage (medicine I'm taking to control my insulin and help get me pregnant) has taken over my body. The side effects are in full force and let's just leave it at that they aren't pretty side effects. I've also started to read a book. I absolutely LOVE reading but don't do it often enough because of a lack of time. And when I do start to read the book I get so completely engrossed in it that I forget about all my other stuff I should be doing and just read. Right now I'm reading "I Don't Know How She Does It" a fabulous book about a corporate mom and how she has to juggle marriage, kids, and work. Though I don't have kids as of yet, I completely understand how hard it is to juggle marriage and a full time job. **sigh** I have to go now, the pizza I ordered is here. I promise to be better and blog religiously! :)

Life has seemed like it has been on fast forward. I feel like I never get anything done. I'm always tired and this medicine IS MAKING ME SICK! And it doesn't stop when I get pregnant, I have to take it through the first trimester to bring the risk of miscarriage down. We ran errands yesterday, bought gas, did the grocery shopping, and played Sims. The husband has taken a nap each day this weekend but when I get up at 10am instead of 9am like I said I would, it pisses him off. URGH! I'm not a morning person, dangit. :(

Today my mother and stepdad came over for lunch. Baked spaghetti. Since we are living in the house I grew up in *that my mother just recently moved out of* and in the process of buying it, I obviously had to do mega cleaning. Now, don't get me wrong I am a clean person. I like to think that I keep a farely well, clean, organized household running. Remember that I do work 40+ hours a week. But my mother (who is perfect, right? and I will never obtain that kind of perfection in her eyes) cleans for a living. That's right folks her 40 hours that she puts in a week are cleaning a workplace. And she used to clean houses for extra cash. And on the weekends for fun she cleans vehicles (washes, waxes, and details) for some extra $$$. And (you guessed it) for fun she also cleans her own house. **sigh** With me being sick every night from this medicine, two dogs, and two very tired people living in the house, we never reach her "idea" of clean.

But it was nice to see them. We haven't done much since they left. Played a little more Sims, took the dogs for a walk. He took a nap but I didn't *because then I would be accused of sleeping too much* (damn double-standard) And my poor mouse is dying. :( I keep giving it CPR, and he is hanging on for dear life. Let's all pray for him because I don't want him to die, nor do I have the money to replace him. I'm going to bed do start another week again. Where the heck did my weekend go? I need like two weeks off to get stuff done, but I'm saving all my PTO to take an extended maternity leave. I want three months with PTO week right before it (so I don't go into labor at work which is highly likely doing the work I do) and a week PTO at the end of the three months. Of course, I guess I should get pregnant first. They don't like handing out time off in the first place, let alone maternity leaves for non pregnant people. More later... and rants that I've been saving up for a day when I have the energy to blog... sweet dreams...

Ella the dog has horrible gas and she always has to be by my side! I love her but my Lord she's stinking me out of the house! I keep looking around to see if she pooped on the floor! ROTFLMAO! gross!

The Thursday Thumb Twiddler

1. You're filing an expense report at work, and there are some items that you know you can fudge for an extra $5 or $10, without chance of being caught. Do you? What if you've done things for your employer in the past that you weren't compensated for?
I being a weak person, would be completely honest. If I fibbed, I would live the rest of my life in fear that I had been caught. I'm a good girl :) *well, when it comes to things like that* ;)

2. You're reading something on a controversial topic that flies in the face of what you believe is true, but which has some interesting points to it that you didn't consider before. Do you keep reading?
Yes, it never hurts to be well informed. It could change my opinion, but probably not since I am so strong willed. And if I was that passionate about the topic, I would need more than *1* source to change my mind.

3. What do you want the most? What if you knew you couldn't get it, no matter what you did?
Right now what I want most in the world is a baby. Melissa said she would kick my ass if I didn't stay posiitive so I'm not going to think about not getting it. Though if it were an object like a car or a sofa, and I knew I couldn't have it, I would probably still keep wanting and working towards in hopes that the future would change and I would be able to get it. If I'm like 90 and I still didn't have it I would just steal it. LOL I really wouldn't but what are they going to do to me at 90? Give me life in jail? Kill me? ROTFLMAO...

Okay so I have a lot of catching up to do. I got online last night to blog and had written a good three or four paragraphs when my screen went completely blank and my computer started coding. *Remember: I work in the OR* So after a bit of CPR, cussing, and just down right praying for it to work again (correctly!) I gave up. I called it at about 2325 and gave it a little going away, R.I.P., prayer. **sigh**

Then I set to work on birthing a new, reformatted hard drive. Now I have to still download my other programs like winamp, KAZAA, yahoo messenger, and ICQ. I do have the essentials though like Insight Cable Program and AOL Instant Messenger. I must work on it more tonight but I'm hungry and want to play the Sims. :) I'm so addicted...

Here is a bit of catching up. Well it will up there ha!

Scottie the Hottie or sometimes known as Suture Boy is supposed to drop by and visit my blog. I wonder if he did. Scottie leave a message! :)

This seemed like fun! This or That:

1. Morning or night person?
Definitely a night person, and I'm slowly turning my hubby into a night owl too! Thank goodness! Getting up at the crack of dawn just isn't fun. And now Ella the puppy will sleep longer in the morning (as long as it's in my bed!)

2. Heavy or light sleeper?
Definitely a heavy sleeper, scares me when I am on call that I might not wake up to the phone or my pager!

3. Remember your dreams or not?
I do remember my dreams. yay! Dreams are fun . :)

4. Do you need a lot of sleep, or just a little?
I thrive on 10 hours of sleep! :) I could sleep for an entire weekend and I would feel great. I think I'm still catching up on sleep from college. ;)

5. Do you need something like a nightlight or TV to sleep, or do you prefer complete darkness?
I used to like to fall asleep watching TV, but my husband didn't like it so I stopped. Now he watches the TV at night, and it's hard for me to fall asleep! Go figure!

6. Flannel sheets or some other kind?
Flannel sheets are nice in the winter, but I like T-shirt sheets!

7. One pillow, or more?
Two pillows please! Though dh and I play keep away with the pillows and covers all night long.

8. Bedroom door opened or closed at night?
Depends on the night and who (dogs) we are trying to keep in, but mainly closed.

9. Wrap yourself into blankets like a cocoon, or just cover yourself with them?
Just cover, but my husband seems to think a cocoon is fun while leaving me freezing!

10. Alarm clock: wake to music or buzzer?
A buzzer, and a very loud one at that! Did I mention I was a heavy sleeper?

So much to say yet so little time. I have a few rants about work but I'll wait till later for that. :) Making dinner for my husband, cheese enchiladas and spanish rice (sorry beanmom, I know you can't have dairy!). LONG day at work today. But I did do something cool. Went to the HEALTHY LIFESTYLES office at work to get a pedometer (for free!) Since 5 o'clock I have taken 4,917 steps! :) That is equivalent to 2.09 miles and I have burned 232.7 calories! Go me! I can't wait to wear it all day tomorrow at work to see how many miles I walk in one day! :) I'll keep ya updated. The dogs are on the floor messing around and they are driving me BANANAS! :) I have so much email to catch up on but now I think I'm going to enjoy the mini date with my husband.. eating and playing sims on playstation2. Isn't love grand? :)

What a weekend! Friday night I went to the Olive Garden with Melissa. It was very yummy! Saturday we didn't do much but ended up going to Ryan's buffet with my mother and stepfather. :) We also went to walmart and picked up the Sims for Playstation2. We have since been glued to the playstation!

Went to the doctor this morning. My insulin is working to hard so I was put on glucophage. She said that I should be pregnant by April! yay! :) If not, we'll try clomid and glucophage. She did say that of all the patients she has treated for Polycystic Ovary Syndrome with glucophage, only one has needed both glucophage AND clomid. So here goes nothing! April isn't that far away but it would be great to get pregnant this next month! Cross your fingers!

The Friday Five:

1. As a child, who was your favorite superhero/heroine? Why?
I really didn't have a superhero favorite. I do remember that I loved the Smurfs and Fraggle Rock. They were awesome. Since I am half mexican, my grandma (who lives in Mexico) would send me taped copies of the Smurfs in Spanish. That was awesome! :)

2. What was one thing you always wanted as a child but never got?
I really can't think of any one thing I didn't get that I wanted. If I didn't get it, I knew that it was because we probably couldn't afford it and that there were good reasons I didn't have it. The person I wanted constantly was my dad after he died. I still want that. :(

3. What's the furthest from home you've been?
Probably Norway. When I was little I was in the Indianapolis Children's Choir and I toured all over the world! I've been to Norway, Italy, Austria, Switerzerland, France, Germany, England, not to mention numerous places here in the states. That was awesome! :)

4. What's one thing you've always wanted to learn but haven't yet? I want to learn to drive a stick shift! I think it would be lots of fun!

5. What are your plans for the weekend?
My husband has a friend coming over tomorrow so I'm going to cook for them, clean the house, and lay low. I'M GOING TO BATHE THE STINKING DOGS!! *which I've been trying to do for a little over a week now!*

THANK GOD IT IS FRIDAY! :) I've waited so long this week to be here. Great TV on last night and I was blessed with the presence of my husband the entire time! I love him so much! I go to the doctor tomorrow morning and on MONDAY! So excited about Monday because we are gonna get pregnant. I'm getting so excited I can't wait! WOOT! Tonight I am going out to eat with my best work buddy Melissa. She is awesome. It's gonna be great! :)

THE THURSDAY THUMB TWIDDLER:

1. When was the last time you ever walked out of a movie while it was still playing on screen? Or have you ever?
I have never done this! Should I have?

2. What sort of things would you do if you could be as outgoing and uninhibited as you wish?
I would tell people what I really thought. I would learn to stick up for myself, voice my opinions and not worry what people will think. I would dance without the assistance of alcohol and sing at the top of my lungs in front of my friends (since I was a voice major, I have a lot of experience singing in front of strangers which doesn't make me nervous at all, but my friends are different because I actually care about what they think!).

3. In an expensive restaurant, after a very nice, enjoyable meal, the waitress brings you your check. You notice you didn't get charged for one of the items. What, if anything, do you do?

I probably wouldn't say anything. (I'm so evil!) If it was an "expensive" restaurant, they would probably be overcharging me anyways. Alas, since I haven't any nerve *see question 2* I would probably just tell them and they would get to overcharge me anyways. :(

Thursday! yay! Must see TV, tonight! :) I'm at work and it looks like I may be able to slip out early so I can get home in time to watch friends! And bake homemade cupcakes for the birthday party at work tomorrow. ;) This morning was interesting. We woke up and it was ABSOLUTELY FREEZING in the house. I looked at the thermostat and it said that it was a whopping 47 degrees! woot! The pilot light blew out and we had to restart it. Taking a shower was a horrible experience, it isn't fun shedding your clothes in 47 degree weather! :) Hopefully it will be nice and cozy when I get home. :)

Okay I apologize. I haven't been back to post for a couple of days. I feel bad! This week has just been nuts. I've been trying to do the glucose testing (though waiting in the outpatient lab for two hours doesn't fit in to my schedule very well), and it has been nuts at work. This is somewhat of a good thing because it keeps me busy and stops me from asking to go home early. Though it is bad because I hate not being at home and being productive, and my feet hurt! I've been trying to go to the grocery store every night this week, but after I get off my feet hurt so bad and my head pounds that I just don't make it. With the glucose test out of the way though, I'm going tonight because I can sleep in tomorrow. I go to the OBGYN on Monday and (FINALLY!) we are going to start the plan to get pregnant! yay! This baby is going to feel wanted when he finds out the pains I went to have him! ;)

I'm at work right now. I'm wishing every minute for a vacation. People all over the surgery department have been calling in sick. We have been somewhat busier already but with the shortage of staff it just makes things worse. I'm still tired of petty people at work too. But I realize that they will never change so I might as well give up. I have to go to the staff meeting we have every Wednesday in a few minutes. That's a guaranteed boring hour!

Not much else going on. We were having issues with the bathtub not draining. We did everything short of pouring acid down the drain to get it to work! My stepdad came and him and my hubby took apart the pipes through the whole house and snaked them. I finally got rid of the drain fumes (gross!) and the tub drains! yay for elbow grease!

I constantly sit and think about getting pregnant. How I want a baby so much! That's all I have ever wanted to do, be pregnant and have babies. Now that it is okay (seeing that I'm a married woman now) it is just my luck that I would have to go through so much red tape. So I hope that the treatment works fast and I get pregnant soon! It would be great to have a baby in time for xmas. :) I'm secretly hoping that it isn't an insulin problem seeing that I don't want to take insulin meds for the rest of my life. Let's just do the clomid drug and get it done quickly! :) I have to go to that stupid meeting now. Hopefully I won't fall asleep! Everyone take care!

Yesterday I wrote this big long blog and when I went to publish it the page displayed an error and my blog was gone forever. :( I did accomplish a bunch of stuff yesterday. I mopped all of the hard wood floors, vaccuumed, and did laundry. :) We went to a superbowl party (though neither of us like sports) at my husbands bosses house. It turned out to be a lot of fun.

I went to the doctor this morning for my ultrasound. Tomorrow I get my blood drawn again and next week back to the doctors office to find out what my treatment plan is. I'm at work right now. I still have another 25 minutes or so before I need to go and change so I'm just kinda surfing the net. Maybe I'll go read FARK. That sounds like a lot of fun. I'm exhausted so I hope work goes fast, I can't leave early today I need the money way to much. I have so much to do at home too. **sigh** Have a great day everybody!

Sorry I didn't post yesterday. I can hardly even remember yesterday, though I do believe I worked really hard. Surgery has been really busy lately, there aren't really any interesting cases though we have been doing a lot of AAA's (aortic aneuryisms.) I hate vascular cases. Today the hubby and I went and purchased tires for the truck. Really big manly tires that make him beam from ear to ear. That puts a smile on my face, though I hate to see what I'll look like climbing out of a truck that tall someday when I'm big and pregnant (hopefully someday soon!) :)

Tomorrow nothing extremely exciting. He wants to go to church, and don't get me wrong I do to, but it has been so terribly cold out that on Sunday morning I am so comfy knowing that I can sleep in (since I don't have to work on Sunday) and that it is so nice and warm and cozy in my bed. I know, it's evil! It reminds me of my mom. (background info you should know: I'm half mexican, half irish. My mother was born in Mexico. so she often speaks or sings to me in spanish) But anyways, on Sunday mornings when I was little she would come in and sing/ whisper this song into my ear in spanish (roughly translated) " in the morning when you are sleeping, the devil comes and says, don't go to church!..." I can't seem to remember the rest though, hehe. Oh, right tomorrow I must also bathe dogs!, mop floors, and vacuum with my brand new hepa filter super vacuum (complete with cape and googles! ha!). **sigh** And I have more laundry to do. When is there not any laundry to do? It really should be legal to do laundry in the nude so that all of the laundry would be finished. Munch, my sorority sister, and I came up with that last year. *don't worry we didn't do our laundry naked, though it was the most brilliant idea we ever came up with at 3:30 in the morning!*

Okay I'm going to bed. It's late Saturday night/ Sunday morning and if he expects me to get up for church in the snow and cold, I better get some sleep. Buenos Noches!

Okay so the major news of the day. I went to the doctor and it looks like I have Polycystic Ovary syndrome. I have to have some more tests before they start the plan of treatment that will get me pregnant. Being pregnant and having a baby is the main goal so I'm keeping my fingers crossed.

It's a bit upsetting that a lot of people at work are pregnant. It seems that they go off of birth control and the next month they are pregnant. That kinda brings me down.

Oh well. I just can't wait for this week to be over. I need the weekend to come and to just relax. **sigh**

Good Morning Miami and Scrubs was good this week, not as good as last week, but still good. I'll post more some other time. Hope all is well out in cyberworld...

Whoopeee! Okay so I figured it out, kudos to me! If any of you out there are having the same problems let me be of some assistance :) You should just go this page to figure out how to put a comments section in!

Okay so I thought I had the comment section figured out but it was a no go. :( Back to the drawing board...

YAY! I figured it out! I now have a comments section! I asked Erich, my husband, how to put it in (since he is a bit more computer and website literate.) So we researched some other blogs and after numerous tries he gave up. I did a bit more research, found part of the solution and was guided to the other half, and together we got a comments section! yay! We make a great team! Since my last post I put contact paper on two shelfs in the potty room and hung the shower curtain = progress! Now I am rewarded with sleep! Mary would like that! ;) Sweet dreams!

No phone call from the MD office today. Everybody has been asking me (which helps to know people care) but it also is really annoying because no matter how far I put it in the back of my mind, once they ask, I can't dodge the situation. I'm just really really anxious. Right now I'm really really tired and really really hungry. I have to go work in the bathroom though (still putting away stuff from the move), that will make my husband happy, which makes things easier on me. So God, if you are out there and reading this, please just let me pregnant and happy. I don't want the polycystic ovary syndrome. :( Goodnight.

I'm at work right now, on my lunch break. I usually come in here to the library to check email and read blogs from Beanmom and Nod and Smile. I'm tired and don't want to be here. I hate this shift. I'm working 11a to 720p and it really is the worst shift on Earth. I never get anything done. I'm really anxious to hear from the doctors office too. They did bloodwork on Friday to find out if I'm pg. May not be pg ( I don't think I am but it would be completely terrific if I were). If not pg, they think I may have polycystic ovary syndrome, which would be awful. I go back to the doctor on Thursday, but they promised they would call before that to tell me what the tests looked like. **sigh** I've got to get back to work now. :(

This is just bizarre.

What a very terribly long day it has been. Sometimes at work I just feel like I can't stand to be there. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE my job. I think surgery is so cool. I think it is weird that we go into a room that really isn't much different from any other room and let people cut us open. It is just the most bizarre concept! I love all the guts and all the gore though. It is pretty cool and I enjoy seeing all the different stuff that I get to see. But anyways back to my rant, I'm tired of people who are just worried that they may have to do more work than other people. Who really gives a flying flip if I do do less work or more work than someone else. We are there to WORK people. This concept is far fetched for some. I'm tired of the people who really don't have any responsibility to anyone else. I know that when I go to work I have to be there to make money to help support my family. I have bills to pay and it doesn't only affect me if they don't get paid. I am not the only person to not eat if I don't make enough. Most of the people that complain and talk about who is doing more work than so and so are the ones that it really doesn't matter if they are there. Nobody depends on them and they aren't committed to anyone in the world. I just want to tell them sometimes, GROW UP! Take some responsibility. IT DOESN'T MATTER! :) Okay, thanks I feel better now.

It is so freaking cold outside! I'm tired of single digit temperatures, though it makes for great sleeping conditions. I didn't even want to get out of bed today let alone get out of the house. So we stayed in and basically did nothing. :) I did do some laundry, laundry, and (you guessed it!) more laundry! How is it that two people can generate so much clothing? How do I go through so much clothing? I go to work and change into scrubs that they launder (which by the way is the most beautiful concept on Earth!) and yet there are millions of shirts down there. And if I'm doing laundry at least twice a week why do we have like ten pairs of dirty underwear (each!) and like a zillion shirts? I swear that the dryer eats the socks and the laundry basket reproduces by the minute.

Other than that we did basically nothing at all. Made dinner and watched a few movies on cable. Since we have lived the first part of our marriage without cable, we each find it very entertaining to just stay in and watch cable television! :) Even the dogs have done just about nothing! Gracy slept and Ella watched TV with us. Yes, the dog did watch TV. It's very entertaining, and she also saw herself in the mirror last night. I was standing behind her and she could see herself and me in the mirror. Then she would turn around and look at me like "Mom, how the heck are you behind me and in the mirror at the same time?" Man I need to have a baby so that then people wouldn't think I was so crazy. Talking about cute things your kids did is great, but talking about the things your cute dog did is just insane! But dangit, I love them so much!

Okay I have to sign off and go to sleep. Have to go to work in the morning while my dear husband gets the day off (MLK day). Why do people have to come down with appendicitis on MLK day? LOL

Does everybody run errands on the weekend like we do? We spent the day at WalMart, Lowe's, and Menards. Home improvement is it's own little addiction. There should be support groups for it. Once you start, you can't stop. One thing leads to another and another and another. You walk into Lowe's and get sucked in by the cool little gadgets and organization that only Sims People live. I know my life is never as organized as it could be.

We bought a new thermostat for the house. It's pretty neat because it adjusts the temperature to the time of day. So it turns the heat down at night when we are asleep and during the day when we are gone. My husband never ceases to amaze me either. We are in Menards and I see this thermostat (that we had talked about the other day) marked down in price. So I say, " do you think you could install this?" And of course he answers, "oh yeah! definitely. I can do that!" And in the back of my mind, (girls you all know this) I think " can he really do it?" Sure enough an hour after he starts, it's mounted and connected. I sit and program it, wondering if it will work, and I hit the pretty button labeled RUN PROGRAM, and the heater kicks on! :) He's amazing! Good thing I married him! ;)

More unpacking tomorrow, but first it is time for sleep. Sleep is the greatest thing God invented...