Friday, September 16, 2005

No News and Some News

Okay, well I was saying before that if I make it to Friday without bleeding then I'd be home free. See this is two weeks from my trigger, and last month I started bleeding two weeks from trigger (12dpo). So it's Friday and I'm not bleeding.

Monday I decided that I'd get a three pack of tests and amuse myself (and occupy) by taking a test on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. I figured, if they came back positive then I could hold out hope, right? Well, Monday evenings test was a big fat negative. So I just shrugged it off. Wednesday test was a faint positive. Faint is the key word here. I said it was the trigger shot (while my friend Krista started getting a wee bit excited). So I couldn't wait until Friday and Thursdays test was another faint positive. Krista said if it were trigger than the line should disappear, right? I said if it were a pregnancy, it would get darker right? She said that didn't happen with the pregnancy she is currently in.

So that brings us to today. I'm not bleeding, I don't feel like I'm going to bleed. I'm 12 dpo, early. I just took an eqate test with the plus minus thing and there is a faint vertical line in the pregnancy part. It didn't really show up until minute 8, but anything within the 10 minute window is still valid, so I've read. And it's very very faint. But I've been told over and over and over again "a line is a line is a line is a line..." **sigh** I have enough tests to get me through Monday (my blood draw day) and to Wednesday (which would be a second blood draw if Mondays is positive.) This line could STILL BE FROM THE TRIGGER SHOT. So wait with me a few more days ladies. Things look hopeful, but I dont' want to get to hopeful, yk? Keep everything crossed. I'll see you on the other side (Monday afternoon). And I'll leave you with a visual of my kitchen window... (they are in the kitchen window because that is where the best light is **wink**)

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Where Am I?

Probably in front of the TV eating. I have this hunger that can not be satisfied. It's starting to get annoying. And if you are wondering the kinds of things I've eaten today? I made beef stew and cream cheese muffins. If you knew me, you'd know that I'm really not one for beef stew. In fact, my mom asked me why I was making beef stew since I don't like it. **shrugs** It sounded good. And it was okay. And the muffins were okay too. The cantaloupe was great but the salsa con queso was a bit salty. I'm already a big girl so all of this eating probably isn't helping. I had fully intended to walk to the PO today (yk, to off set the eating) but it was 95 degrees today. No sir, I won't walk in that heat. So either I'm getting ready for AF, or there is a baby who is jumping on the eating bandwagon.

And unlike last month where I had a definite feeling that things didn't work, I'm lost this month. Some moments I think "nah" and other moments I feel "maybe?" Is it Friday yet?