To Do

I feel as if I'm drowning. So many things to do, but nothing seems to be getting done. Both girls are so time consuming, which isn't a bad thing at all, it's just, well, we're busy busy busy. Magdalena is sitting here at the table with me talking about how she played in the playroom. She talks to me all day long. Non stop. I love to hear her talk, but it's hard to hear my own internal dialogue that tells me what to do all day over her talking. She's eating a tuna sammich. She requested it. I ask her what she wants for lunch and she responds happily "TUMA!" I ask, "a tuna sandwich?" And she answers, "yes! A sammich!" heh.

Carmina is just as gorgeous and wonderful as her sister. She's trying to find some sort of balance between being awake and napping. She's making that transition where she doesn't just nurse and nap but needs some awake time. The problem is she just can't figure out how much of each she needs and it's been a bit difficult to get anything done. I'm sure it will work itself out.

My other "dilemma" with her is if I should push the pacifier on her or not. She needs constant sucking. Constant. And she doesn't always want *me*. Her sister took a pacifier at night and it was pretty easy to break her from the paci. I knew she didn't need it and she fussed to have it occasionally. I think her main thing as it was more habit than need so I just put them away. I told her that all the pacis were gone and she wasn't happy with that, but she didn't protest. And the pacifier was gone. So it was easy to get rid of. However, Carmina likes to suck her fist. Well, she's trying to suck her thumb but can't figure out a good way. So she'll just shove her fist in or her fingers. And I'm kinda cool with the idea of her sucking her thumb, as I'm pretty sure it was an inutero habit as well considering she's been doing it from the very first second. She'll take the pacifier but not well. And she's recently learned how to pull the paci out. When she does this, then she'll just suck on her fingers while holding the paci, and occasionally stops to give me a big grin. I worry that getting her to stop sucking her fingers years down the road will be harder than just taking a pacifier away. She'll have me obviously until she self weans. I worry about her teeth, you know? I'm sure she'll show me what she needs.

Speaking of weaning, Magdalena is still nursing strong. My new "milestone" is 3 years. When we hit that point, I'm not sure if I'll make another milestone. I had a hard time making a milestone after 2, but when I was pregnant and knew that she needed to nurse, I needed to make a milestone for myself to push through it.

She isn't potty trained yet either. There has been "encouragement" from my mother to "just do it" but honestly I don't have the time or energy to push it. I don't *want* to push it either. I don't want pt'ing to be this constant nagging on me, a reluctance for her, and end up being years of struggles. I'd like it to be her choice. I know that she has the capabilities of doing it cause when she runs around here nakey, she'll always go use the potty in the bathroom. I think she has a hard time distinguishing panties from diapers. And if I were buying diapers, it'd probably be more of a push for me to pt. But since I'm already washing diapers for her sister, what's a couple more? And here is my deep dark secret. As pro self weaning I am, I'd rather her potty train after she weans, because the thought of nursing someone who is potty trained is really hard to wrap my brain around. Of course, three years ago, nursing someone who was almost 3 years old was hard to wrap my brain around. So obviously, that deep dark secret could be for nothing in a few months time. Who knows.

I'm not sure how to end this rambling long post. So I'll end with a picture or two. These were taken on our venture out to go apple picking with Meemaw and Papa (Erich's parents).