Monday, January 12, 2004

A Housewife

That's officially what I am... a housewife. I went to the doctor today. All fine and dandy in the waiting room, did my share of waiting, got the confirmation that my new improved better insurance pays 100% of EVERYTHING without hassles of precerts and crap that comes with HMO's. (We now have an EPO-exclusive provider organization- that pays like an HMO but works like a PPO. Erich officially can't change jobs unless they have that insurance plan. heh.) Anywho. I went back and my blood pressure was sky high for me. Technicially it's on the high side of "normal" (whatever normal is) but super high for myself. The bad part was that I wasn't at work or doing anything before I went to the doctor. Just got up, ate breakfast, showered, watched some TV, blogged and left for the appt. So... she took me off of work. And I started to cry. Why was I crying? I haven't the slightest idea. I felt like an idiot sitting on the table in only my bra and shirt, hanging on to the paper sheet (and what good is a see through paper sheet anyways?), crying like a baby. Thoughts of always having worked and now suddenly not working came rushing into my head. Thoughts of stressing my husband out and making him the sole provider swam in my head. She went on to say that she wanted to see me on Thursday to check my blood pressure. I was put on modified bed rest, i.e. take it easy and finish up the things I need to get done before Baby Girl gets here. She said that if my blood pressure is the same and not higher, we'll stay with the course of an u/s on Monday to see exactly how big baby girl is now (side note: I'm 37 weeks 2 days pregnant and baby now measures 40 weeks!) and on Tuesday she is going to bring me in to start P-gel and then hopefully have a baby sometime Wednesday. This also brought on more tears. I know that a lot of people didn't think an induction was the greatest idea, but as I told Rachel in an email, there were certain reasons we were leaning towards the induction. I work in the medical profession and I know all of the pros and cons of induction. The pros being that with my specific situation that an induction may be safer and I would have comfort in a more controlled environment. But with the reasons for the induction changing, I'm more scared. Maybe I'm scared because now it is actually scheduled, in the books, and the maternity center will be expecting me on Tuesday evening. The fact that I will be holding my baby in my arms next weekend also brought on a whole load of emotions ranging from fear to joy and excitement. I'm not spilling protein in my urine, so I'm not too worried about toxemia. She says high bp at the end of pregnancy is normal, but mine went way up. She says it's my body telling her that it is time to move on and get baby out before any harm comes to me or her. I'm feeling the need for a bit of encouragement and hoping that I don't get comments about not having an induction. I value the opinions of everyone who reads this blog and I know they are leaving the comments in caring for my health, but right now I think I need more of a pat on the back and a hug. So with all of this bustle I should pack my bag. Heh.

Oh and if my blood pressure continues to go up Thursday, she said we'd re-evaluate our plan of action. She can't technically induce until I'm 38 weeks unless my blood pressure goes up more. So we'll "wait and see", a phrase I absolutely loathe.

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