I'm gonna be okay I think. AF hasn't arrived yet the OBGYN said it is okay for now. Hold out, if it doesn't come in a week, take another test. Do these people realize how long a freaking week is? Obviously not, they are probably one of those people that get pregnant just because they kissed their husband. :( (nothing against those of you who have no trouble getting prego) She did however call in a prescription for Clomid. I asked for it. I'm tired of this. Emotionally I just can't take it. I know that I haven't gone through this nearly as long as everyone else. You all are so brave. It's just that with my previous hx of depression and such, I just don't know how much more of it that I can take before it drives me into the ground for good. I need a bit of happiness. In fact, I deserve a little happiness. We all do. We just don't realize it. But we should though. We are all wonderful.

I told dh this morning to not worry about multiples. I'm not taking shots of clomid, just the oral version *that is if AF ever decides to come* which should lower the risks of multiple births. My rational to him was that if we can't get one what makes him think we would get two? Though deep down inside I think twins would be cool, though a ton of trouble, considering I already have Ella (my puppy!) who thinks that I am her mom. She is so big! She turned 1 year old this month!! Right now Ella is sitting in the chair a few feet away from me. She is pretty tired. Me too. I should go to bed.

Tomorrow I have to get up at the crack of dawn to clean a house. Then I'm off to work, and afterwards, I'm going to babysit. **yawn** I'm tired just thinking about it. Oh! My stepdad is having surgery on his spine tomorrow (they are going through his neck! eek!). So please keep him in your thoughts. I told him it was a walk in the park and for the most part should be easy for him since he'll be knocked out. (thank God for propofol!) heh I also told him it's like walking across the street, millions do it every day. Although once in a while one will get hit by a gravel truck. ROTFL Thank goodness he thought it was funny. :)

Okay off to bed. And if you guys don't mind, will you still keep hoping that I'm pregnant? I know that it's a shot in the dark but maybe it could happen, right Lily? ;) If not, hope that this clomid works right away! Good night and sweet dreams to all. I sometimes wish I could meet every one of you fabulous women who share your lives with me. You guys are truly awesome. Kind of like a sorority (right Dawn?) :) Kappa Kappa Blog *heh I crack myself up!*