Hi all. I've been quiet lately. In fact I've been quiet ALL of the time. It has been such an emotional month. I'm 6 days past ovulation today. 12 more and that would mean I would most likely be pregnant. Man I want it so bad. I'm sure you understand. I think about it all day and dream about it all night. I was having weird muscle cramps/ovary cramps the other night while laying in bed with DH watching TV. He looks over at me and says, " wouldn't it be great if some embryo was just burying itself in you right now? " Yes it would. It makes me want to cry to think that him and I could create a baby. A baby that is so wanted and will be so loved that I feel at times I am just going to burst. Okay, now I'm crying and I'm sitting in the hospital library so I probably look like a freak!

Now I wonder if I should test on day 28 of my cycle or wait to see if I get to 18 dpo. Hmm. Man I don't want to see AF.

So I've been quiet lately and tired. It seems I have left my brain in other places because I can't seem to remember simple stuff. I don't know what it is but I hope I feel back to normal soon, whatever the hell that may be. I hate work. I dread it, which isn't like me. It just seems now that the shit is hitting the fan and it awful to be here. I don't want to be here. I'm tired of seeing pregnant bellies (though I would like to see Dawn's) I actually love preg bellies but lately I just can't seem to get happy for "real life" people. I'm ecstatic about Dawn though. And I can't wait to see a picture of her and hear her name! I will get that package in the mail Dawn, I promise! I'm running out of time! :)

Thanks to Jennifer for the Mothers Day wish. That also made me cry. :)

Just as a warning we still do not have internet at home. I just need to copy all of the blog addresses down and then reformat the computer. I think somethings bad in there so might as well. That damn computer is probably nearing the end. I just pray it holds on a couple of more months. I will try and get to the library to post if I can't get it to work at home. If not I'll talk to you all on Monday. Have a fabulous weekend.

Hi all. I've been quiet lately. In fact I've been quiet ALL of the time. It has been such an emotional month. I'm 6 days past ovulation today. 12 more and that would mean I would most likely be pregnant. Man I want it so bad. I'm sure you understand. I think about it all day and dream about it all night. I was having weird muscle cramps/ovary cramps the other night while laying in bed with DH watching TV. He looks over at me and says, " wouldn't it be great if some embryo was just burying itself in you right now? " Yes it would. It makes me want to cry to think that him and I could create a baby. A baby that is so wanted and will be so loved that I feel at times I am just going to burst. Okay, now I'm crying and I'm sitting in the hospital library so I probably look like a freak!

Now I wonder if I should test on day 28 of my cycle or wait to see if I get to 18 dpo. Hmm. Man I don't want to see AF.

So I've been quiet lately and tired. It seems I have left my brain in other places because I can't seem to remember simple stuff.

Whoa, I am not a tramp! I think it may be all the raging hormones affecting my subconscious.

Tramp Bear


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Try this link for my chart.

Stolen from Dawn.


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Still no internet!!! I spoke with the cable company this morning. They can't see my computer, the comp says "cable unplugged", and the modem responds when they ping so the problem is on my end. Maybe dh will be in a better mood tonight and can take a look at it and fix it.

My temp chart looks very promising! yay! So I'm going to go and try and figure out how I can link it so you guys can tell me if you think it looks promising.

I was reading dh copy of "Wired" magazine last night. They were talking about blogspace. It was said that this guy knew what was going on in the lives of his 10 favorite bloggers better than what was going on in the lives of his "real life" closest friends, and it is SO TRUE! It makes sense though. I tell you guys everything and I don't speak much anymore in real life, though I am a big talker. Oh well. I catch you all on the shizzy (I've been reading stuff on the Shizzolator too much!)

This time I have an excuse for not blogging! :) The storm knocked out the cable sometime Saturday afternoon. Hopefully I will be able to get online. We finished our fence this weekend. It is SUPER nice and Ella LOVES it. Dh joked that you can almost hear her singing "Let freedom ring!" out in the yard while she is running around! It's fun to watch her.

My BBT temps dropped significantly on Saturday and shot back up Sunday and a bit higher today. Hopefully that is good news. I'm hoping to get out of here early today so I can go home and finish mowing the lawn. I got the yard inside the fence mowed now just need to do the part that everyone can see! :) Back to hell, I mean work.

I know this is late but I've avoided reading others to be untainted! :)

1. Nanny:: Rich
   
2. Weight:: Loss
   
3. Deep:: Sorrow
   
4. Sock:: Holey
   
5. 24 hours:: a day, 7 days a week
   
6. Tongue:: hehehe
   
7. Fees:: money
   
8. Champagne:: Toast
   
9. Bruise:: ouch
   
10. Pancakes:: breakfast
    

Sorry about my absence. I've not been feeling well the past few days. Yesterday dh and I had the day off. We started building the fence. It is almost finished. yay! :) Last night I had horrible "ovary" pains. My ovaries felt like they were splitting open. Hopefully that is a good thing. A girl at work who took clomid said that that is what it felt like too. I think I had a positive OPK this morning but both lines were faded but they were both the same darkness. The temps are staying about the same but the same girl also said that her temps didn't change on clomid. So we'll see! I've got to write out bills now. I'll blog more lately. :)

Clomid Day Four and Five

Days three and four went a lot like two and three. There were more hot flashes, my bitchy attitude, and a new fun one-- headaches. Having suffered from migraines for most of my life (from about age 14 or 15) these little "clomid" headaches go from little to big in seconds. Vicodin is my friend and the phenegran they gave me. Wow. God bless the man who invented phenegran. (Phenegran is for nausea) Though I have to watch out since I should ovulate towards the end of this week and we want babies! No more drugs after babies (well, not the good ones at least) so I'm making the best of them now. :)

We had a busy weekend. Did a ton of babysitting on Saturday in addition to running errands and planting flowers in the yard! yay! :) Sunday we went to see his parents and had lunch and then we headed back here. I had an activity to attend with Jill and then came home. I had a headache that was progressing to a migraine (go figure!) so dh and I snuggled into bed and watched The Nutty Professor. I forgot how funny it is! :)

It was beautiful today despite the storms last night. At some point it knocked our power out and I miraculously woke up around 3:30am to a blinking alarm clock. I scrambled around *while everyone else slept. The dogs even looked at me like "lady it ain't time to get up!"* I set the alarm and fell right to sleep. :) The storm did tear up our screen door-- the hinge part that makes it slide shut. So we need to fix that before the appraiser comes to appraise the house. We should be closing by the end of this month. Whoopee! :)

Dh and I are going to one of my managers house in the morning. He is going to mow and trim her lawn and I am going to clean. So with such a busy day tomorrow, I should be heading off to bed now. Goodnight, sweet dreams...

Clomid Day Two and Three

Bitchiness prevails. I'm liable to snap at any and all living things these days. It's awful. And the hot flashes!!! I thought I was going to sweat to death today at work. IT WAS UNBEARABLE! I picked a fight last night with dh and for the love of God I don't know what I was fighting about! Please please please pray that I get pregnant this month. I fear for other people lives if I have to take another round of Clomid.

take the virgin-whore dichotomy quiz.


and go to mewing.net. where we're all studs.

Clomid Day One

Well first pill was this morning. Not feeling to bad. I don't know quite what I am expecting to happen. Well other than getting pregnant. I DO expect that to happen. I was a bit nauseous in the mid morning which I contribute to the clomid. I forgot to take my BBT this morning. Oh well.

In other news, last night I became a Mary Kay consultant. Yes I know this sounds very corny. "ding dong! Avon calling!" But I figure, hey I've already have three jobs on top of trying to keep up with my house, what's one more? Yes the job count for me is up to five: a) my job at the hospital, b) babysitting/dogsitting, c) cleaning houses, d) mary kay, e) taking care of my hunny, dogs, and house. How the hell did my mother do it? Props to her. I'm EXHAUSTED!

This morning we went to Wells Fargo and got a home mortagage!!!! People keep telling me, "congratulations! you're in debt for the next 30 years!!!" WOOHOO~! :)

Bad news struck home today. Am I going to lose my job? We are so slow in surgery tomorrow that they gave me the day off. I have mixed emotions. If we are slow that isn't good because we need to be busy so I can keep my job. On the other hand, I need a day off! :) I'm going to do all of my laundry tonight. In the morning I have a house to clean, and afterwards I'm just going to veg out! Maybe I'll get outside in my yard and do some work, but it's highly doubtful! Also dh informed me that I have webspace on insightbb.com so I can upload some pictures to share with you lovely people! yay! :)

Okay time to get moving. Oh and by the way, Anyone want to buy some Mary Kay products? You know you do! ;)

The blood test was a big fat negative. :( So we are starting a new game...clomid. Let's pray it only takes one month guys. **fingers crossed**

I say ... and you think ... ?

1. Slob:: -by Pig
2. 60:: seconds
3. Personals:: Ad
4. Famous:: Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
5. Cancer:: July
6. Internet:: Blog
7. Previously:: Known
8. Moonshine:: Really Drunk
9. Ants:: in your pants!
10.Check:: book

It's late but I am updating for Rachel. :) She wanted to know how things went. The cheesecake is delicious... yum. I didn't make the bread because I didn't have apple juice and didn't want to go get any. How is that for lazy? If anybody wanted to know if I'm pregnant ( ;) ) I still don't know! I know the suspense is horrible, isn't it? I went this morning and had my blood drawn.

If you remember, I started taking Prometrium (progesterone) around March 20th or so. I took the progesterone for 23 days with my last dose ending on April 11. :) It is now April 26 and AF has not arrived. This suggests that I may be pregnant. I've taken two HPT now and they have both been negative, but my doctor still wanted the bloodwork done. I found this link though and don't know how to feel about it... Progesterone and No Period. What do you think that means?

It's cold and icky out. Yuck. I'm home from work early. Spent all day trying to teach people the new computer system. Yee haw. I go tomorrow to the hospital to get my blood drawn. Then they will find out if I am pregnant and if so how pregnant I am. Keep your fingers crossed that there is a little pea growing in there. DH is praying cause he doesn't want to do clomid. Since we know my cousin is having triplets and she was on clomid he is a bit scared hehehe. :) I'm more scared of carrying twins and of the risks to me but mostly to babies. :)

I'm making cheesecake right now. And cinnamon apple bread (it's fabulous served warm with butter sugar and cinnamon on top) and brown rice. :) Leftover ham will also be served sometime tonight and I need to do laundry! :) I'll write more later tonight or tomorrow! :)

To take a test or not... that is the question.

Tomorrow is Thursday. One week since the last prego test. Should I take it? I hate the disappointment. I don't know. Hm.... What do you guys think? Should I take the test in the morning?

I apologize for being MIA this week. I'll try and be better. I'm going to rewrite what I wrote yesterday just making sure to save frequently! I only have about 15 minutes. Okay I last wrote on Thursday. Friday I cleaned a house, went to my "normal" job, and then went to babysit. The house wasn't to terribly awful. I would consider it somewhat picked up except in areas where kids are at. It mainly needed dusting and such. I ran out of time so I'll go earlier next week and work on more details. I think by the end of next time or the time after it will be in an excellent condition and more easily maintained. :) I didn't get to blog Friday night because by the time the day was over I was exhausted and went straight to bed!

On Saturday morning, we went to breakfast with my grandparents. We really enjoy eating with them! Afterwards all of us went for a walk in the cemetery with the dogs. My older dog, Gracy, loves to go to the cemetery and chase moles! Ella loves the wide open space to run in. Saturday evening we went and babysat for the usual people. We really enjoy their kids and the 5month old daughter now recognizes us. The little boy adores my husband and the little girl loves to coo and giggle at him. It is so fun to watch him interact with the babies. :) Makes my heart swell. I want to give him one so badly.

Nothing else new. I continue to dislike my job with each passing day. I think if I only had one day off in the middle of the week it would make all of the difference. I would be able to run errands and tend to the house. Once we get the debt paid off I think I am definitely scaling back to partime. After we have a baby I don't intend to work at all. :) Yay! Something to look forward to.

The doctor has prescribed clomid for me. Now if AF would ever arrive it would help. I took my last dose of Progesterone on April 11 so I should have started AF by now. I took a test on the 17th and it was negative so maybe I'll take another one tonight. The doctor is supposed to call today. She may want me to have some bloodwork done. I'm tired of it. I really have just tried to forget about AF. **sigh**

Well I'm off to a meeting now. I'm going to try to get off of work early tonight. Wish me luck. My tummy hurts! :)

Sunday we worked on the house getting it ready for company and I spent most of the day in the kitchen. We had Easter dinner around 4pm. My mom and stepdad, grandparents, and brother in law came. We had spiral ham, corn casserole, green bean casserole, sour cream potatoes, and rolls. Mmmm...

We've been taking lots of walks lately. It has been fun and the dogs really enjoy it. Besides that the exercise makes me feel thin. :)